MAR 2010
What a busy month Feb turned out to be. I went for a trial to be a BBC Radio presenter - so you may be hearing 'The Milly Johnson' show in the future as well as reading the books. Don't know how though - I think I sound like a strangled parrot. Still it was great fun and cranked up the adrenaline levels no end.
63 days to BOOK LAUNCH now (at time of writing) and I'm so excited about it because it's a little different to my others - not too much, but then I don't have a vampire in the previous ones ;)
I'm looking forward to the Wrestling Extravaganza this weekend (see Jan) There is still time to get tickets and see Klondyke Kate wrestle again - and Robbie Brookside, or meet Max Crabtree. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity to see the old heroes.
Quite a few appearances this month
11th March - I'm in Cawthorne
18th March - Sheffield WI
20th March - my biggest audience yet at the Hospice lunch which I am SO looking forward to.
More news later - I just wish I had more time to sit down and write books! So much takes you away from your desk in this job :)
FEB 2010
Thurs 11th Feb - Radio Sheffield at 10am talking to Paulette about BULLYING IN THE WORKPLACE
Sorry folks - no idea when my Come Dine With Me week is going to be shown yet - it hasn't been scheduled in. I will announce it as soon as I know.
JAN 2010
GRAPPLE FANS - there is a WORLD OF SPORT LEGENDS SHOW on March 6th in Rothwell Sports Centre, junction 10 M62 at 7.30pm - where aficionados of the glory days can meet up with their old heroes like Johnny Kincaid, Johnny Saint, Marty Jones and WWE's Robbie Brookside and many more - see here for the poster (it's a PDF file - or here if you can't view PDFs). It promises to be a fantastic night. Tickets are £10 only - details on the poster.
Some exciting news - talks have begun to turn the Yorkshire Pudding Club into a film! Now, I've been here before so I'm not letting myself get too excited because these things have a real tendency to flare up and flop like a firework from the pound shop. But it's nice to dream and I'm enjoying seeing the process unfold. Out of all my books, this is the one I really want to see in film and so far so good.
Anyway - my new book is out in 97 days (at time of writing). It's the grittiest one yet and very contentious in places. Just because I use humour, doesn't mean to say I don't tackle the weightier subjects - life contains both, so why shouldn't books?
And, early news as it is, the title of book 5 has been agreed - HERE COME THE GIRLS. It's all about 4 women on a cruise. It's great fun to write and the research is second to none :)
Here's a Yorkshire Post article I wrote about becoming a novelist - stop faffing about and just do it!
DECEMBER
16th - Had a lovely intimate evening at the Civic reading poetry with my old friend James Nash and my new friend Andrew McMillan - the very talented son of local Lord Ian McMillan. Mince pies, mulled wine and good company. We will definitely do it again. And if you do enjoy poetry, do check them both out because they are very VERY good.
I can't compete with their skill, but here is a little (!) Christmas poem to entertain. I've brought 'The Night Before Christmas' up to date and set it in the North.
Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse
The whippets were snoring all snug in their begs
While visions of dried pigs ears danced in their heads
And I in my curlers, with Baileys nightcap
Had just settled down for a long winter's nap
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter
I sprang from my pit to see what was the matter
Oh God, not some hoodie with drug-addled brain
Out to kill me for pence just to buy crack cocaine
But no, twas a sleigh landing lively and quick
I knew in a moment, it must be St Nick
He was leading eight reindeer all cuddly and tame
And he whistled and shouted and called them by name
"Now Demi, now Jordan, now Gaga and Whitney
On Cheryl, on Shannon, on Brooklyn and Britney"
(Alas even in these traditional rhymes
Names are obliged to move with the times)
His eyes how they twinkled, his nose like a cherry
He made straight for my bottle of Bristol Cream Sherry
He was portly - with chins, a right jolly elf
If I hadn't just waxed, he'd have looked like myself
Though red's not forgiving and had I been him
I'd have gone for all black with a fake sable trim
His sack was packed full with iPhones and iPods
"Eeeh the kids of today" he said "Spoilt little sods
No orange, no nuts, no small hanging socks
They want five hundred quid and a flaming X Box"
He laughed like a drain then "So long as they're happy
You can't have bairns sad cos their presents are crappy"
Then spotting the carrots he said "Oh that's kind
To have the concerns of my reindeer in mind.
They so love their vegs, they'll have quite a feast
And then they'll be trumping till Easter at least."
He looked at his list, "And now let me see
What, my dear lady, did you ask from me?"
"A Tiffany watch," I said, "Three Mont Blanc pens
Brad Pitt in his pants and a Mercedes Benz"
I tried, but it came as little surprise
To get Thorntons and books and some slippers my size.
He burped up his booze, like a typical bloke
Then adjusted his crotch and fastened his cloak
He gave me awink and bid me adieu
Then called to his reindeer and sprang up the flue
They rose to the sky and there in formation
They flew faster away - than Tiger Wood's reputation
But I heard St Nick shout as he guided his fleet
"Happy Christmas Dear Barnsley - God Bless... and Good Neet."
NOVEMBER
24th - Do you know any LOCAL HEROES from Barnsley who deserves an accolade? International photographer - and local lad - Chris Sedgewick, is looking for those wonderful inspirational people who represent the spirit of Barnsley, people who have gone the extra mile - dinnerladies, policemen, coaches, nurses, sportsmen, doctors ... people other than the usual 'celebs' associated with Barnsley, true heroes who deserve to have a professional photographic portrait hanging in the huge flagship Plaza in the Townend and be part of a permanent exhibition. If you know of anyone who fits the bill, click here to register your nomination. And watch out for updates on my site and in the Chronicle.
7th - First news is that the publication of book 4 has been put back to the end of April. Don't know why, publication dates are never really set in stone, but it is a summery book, so really it's the ideal time to launch as Britain warms up.
The second news is that I've just spent the maddest week EVER filming COME DINE WITH ME. I can't give out details about recipes or who won or who else was on - I'm contracted to keep my trap shut plus I don't want to spoil any surprises but what I can say is that I have had the wildest week of my life. I am so glad I auditioned because I met the most fabulous people and I'm wondering around lost now and not knowing what to do with myself. There will be lots more detail when the show is aired, but it will be rock n roll. And I think the kids will disown me.
Now I'm having to do a big 'Come Diet With Me'!
OCTOBER
23rd - a little article in the Keighley News - big giants, short authors and little cuddly kittens.
21st - Did a wonderful talk in Doncaster library. I'm always amazed when a lot of people turn up to see me but we had such a jolly evening and I was made to feel very welcome. Any authors reading this who would like to do a talk with them, and sell some books, would be hard pressed to find a friendlier venue.
7th - Had an absolutely fantastic day in Blackpool at their 'Wordpool' Book Festival. Met some cracking authors who I've been chatting with online - Kate Long and I had a great gossip about Catherine Tate and Anne Reid who starred in the TV version of her book 'The Bad Mother's Handbook' (I'm such a star spotter!) and it's always a pleasure to see the lovely Jane Costello. It's fascinating to learn how other authors work. Some of us plot out books, some (like me) just dive in and swim. However many books I get under the belt, I'll always be on a learning curve!
SEPTEMBER
22nd - I'm finally back into proper work mode - although it's taken me a while because I was on too much of a high on holiday and my head was still in that gorgeous little restaurant in Venice being served the most simple, but fabulous, meal of grilled chicken, iceberg lettuce, plump black olives and mayonnaise as thick as my first boyfriend.
I've just managed 9000 words of the new book in 2 days, which was going some. It took me about an hour to get the first words down - that mass expanse of white on the screen is always a killer, but then the words just flowed. Mind you, it is only a first draft so names and hair colourings and events change and I've had to go back and do a bit of editing so I can keep some continuity. I'm loving it though. It's very sketchy at the moment but the editing will start to add some colour and depth. I have to produce the first 100 pages to determine my new contract - so no pressure then!
My friend Kate Harrison sent me this a while ago - for anyone who needs some inspiration to get some words down on paper. It's a word count tool and is called Dr Wicked.
1st - I'm back after a wonderfully relaxing three week cruise in the Adriatic. Although I did get a fair bit of work done along the way too. Writing never feels like work to me - luckily I often work to relax because I find it difficult to switch off, but there were plenty of moments of sitting by the pool, cocktail in hand and warming my bones in the sunshine. Now I'm raring to go and will do as soon as the lads go back to school next week. I'm writing two books this year and dropping all other commitments to get that done. So watch this space...
AUGUST
6th - firstly a huge THANK YOU to everyone who has been so kind to write to me recently about my books. I'm finding, for the first time, that I'm starting to struggle to reply to so many, so please bear with me. I'm touched that so many people have written - it means a lot.
I've also been giving permission to release a blurb for book 4. So here it is...
'When dynamic, power-dressing Christie blows in like a warm wind to take over their department, five very different women find themselves thrown together at work. But none of them could have predicted the fierce bond of friendship that her leadership would inspire . . .
Anna, 39, is reeling from the loss of her fiancé, who ran off with a much younger woman leaving her pride in tatters. So when a handsome, mysterious stranger takes an interest in her, she's not sure whether she can learn to trust again. Then there's Grace, in her fifties, trapped in a loveless marriage with a man she married because she fell in love with his motherless brood. Grace worries that Dawn is about to make the same mistake: orphaned as a teenager, engaged to love-rat Calum, is 33 year old Dawn more interested in the security that comes with his tight-knit, boisterous family? And when a sexy, footloose guitar man catches her eye, will Dawn have the courage to follow her heart?
At 28, Raychel would seem to be the happiest, with a loving husband, Ben, and their cosy little nest for two. But what dark secrets are lurking behind this perfect facade, that make sweet, pretty Raychel so guarded and unwilling to open up?
Under Christie's kindly hand, the girls soon realise they have some difficult choices to make. Indeed, none of them quite realised how much they needed the sense of fun, laughter, and loyalty that abounds when five women become friends.'
It isn't a sequel to The Yorkshire Pudding Club but the three heroines of that book do make a reappearance in A Summer Fling. One especially. That's all I'm allowed to say on the subject for now. But I hope readers will be happy to see their return.
1st - It's Yorkshire Day. I feel as if I should be celebrating so I've bought some wine (any excuse). Although we did enough celebrating on Wednesday night at the Cooper Art Gallery in Barnsley to last me all year. I had the night of my life. I'm so proud of being part of that fab exhibition. Everyone worked so hard on it and it showed. You MUST go and see it if you're in Barnsley. It's there until September 5th and it's a lovely way to spend some time.
I'm now taking a little time off to recharge my batteries. Then I hit the ground running with book 5 which is forming nicely but I had an epiphany at the Cooper party and a great big chunk of story landed neatly in my lap... another reason to be endeared to all the lookalikes who were there. Absolute charmers - if you ever booked them for a party, you will be bowled over. If you check out my blog you'll find all the links should you ever want a Bond themed night. Must admit, it's a strange sensation being told by Bond to grab his a*se. But I didn't want to upset him by refusing.
That's the thing about being an author, the rewards aren't always where you think they are. It was fab to get involved with something not strictly book related as a fresh opportunity and see what I could do with it. I honestly loved every minute. Much as I love writing, it's nice to give myself an airing and tackle something unusual - and they didn't get more unusual than that. Great fun.
So just letting my brain roam for a month now, writing a few jokes for my living and brushing up my cartooning skills (which need more of an intensive valet than a brush to be honest). I find it nigh on impossible to switch off, but when I do, I realise just how much I need to unwind. Everyone's brain needs a holiday.
So excited that the release date for book 4 is getting closer and closer. It's my most ambitious book yet, with a touch of the paranormal thrown in, which I love. Fridays and 'True Blood' just don't come around fast enough. Wonder what the chances of getting a vampiric James Bond themed party would be? Maybe for my 50th... better get saving! ;)
JULY
28th - It's official - my book 4 is named and available for pre-order on Amazon. It's called A SUMMER FLING and it's the story of 5 women, all different ages, all with their private heartaches, who find friendship with each other at work. More on that later.
25th - The Gary Tiplady exhibition is now open in the Cooper Art Gallery in Barnsley. See my blog for details, but it's a fantastic thing to take the kids to. It's not just sculpture, it's about the life of a giant who embraced his difference. You'll all be able to see how to walk in a 7ft 3" guy's footsteps as well as admire what he can do with wire. I've done the wording for it. I'm very proud of it actually.
The work on book 4 is finished although I was burning the candle at 12 ends (deformed candle) but I needed it out of my hands before the kids broke up. And we've got a title - but I'm sworn to secrecy at the moment.
The dog continues to grow far bigger than I'm sure he was supposed to. I'm surprised he's not got three heads. He has a passion for pig's ears at the moment. I only wish I could find a man who was as attentive to mine!
3rd - I've just returned from doing a Radio Sheffield show and couldn't believe the surprise they landed on me - a conversation with Dame Edna Everage! AND she promised to send me some of her glasses. When you get a perk in this job, it's a big one. I adore her so it was absolutely fantastic and I'm finding it really difficult to come back to earth and get some work done. If only all surprises in life were as nice as that one - thank you Gareth Evans for making my day/week/month/millenium!
1st - Can't believe how many lovely letters I'm getting from people. Thank you SO much - it's just wonderful to know my books are being enjoyed and helping people clutter clear. I love the story that the lady went clearing out her cupboards after reading my book and chucked out a load of bird seed. 'The budgie's been dead 5 years!' she said. Just wonderful.
My book 4 needs a bit of a rewrite so been working hard on that. It's a wee bit too dark, but that's okay - it was nice to stretch my wings and maybe later I'll pick up another genre where I can really let my dark side go.
Had a wonderful day on the 30th June at the unveiling of Dickie Bird's statue in town. It was warm and emotional and full of people in jolly mode and loads of cold wine and fantastic canapes. Graham Ibbeson is going to do my statue one day (he said with tongue firmly lodged in cheek) and I've made him promise to give it long legs and knock off the spider veins.
Sales are still strong on my new book and I'm thrilled. It's as if my career has gone up a notch. I just wish this recession would blow over - it's affecting the whole world re book sales!
And things are hotting up for our Barnsley wire exhibition with Gary 'Jaws' Tiplady at the end of the month in the Cooper Art Gallery. It'll be great to take the kids along to and even when Gary isn't there in person, there is a figure of him that the kids can be photographed with and walk in a giant's footsteps and see how a young bullied skinny kid grew up to be a giant artist.
JUNE
Well - flaming June! Although looking out of the window at the rain slashing against the window...
The month so far has been brilliant for the book part of my life. A Spring Affair made the top 100 in Amazon fiction. It keeps dipping in and out - and it's not exactly number 1, but it's the highest it's ever been and that's so exciting. I'm absolutely chuffed to bits.
Book 4 has been delivered to my publishers now for perusal. It's the biggest book yet and, though not a sequel, my ladies of the Yorkshire Pudding Club make a big heavy cameo return. It was like meeting old friends again.
And I stepped in my grandad's footsteps this month - if you live anywhere near the Yorkshire Mining Museum - you must go! It's free but donations are welcome to look after the old pit ponies and the upkeep. How the heck people survived in there I just don't know. Little 6 year olds in the pitch black (and I mean pitch black because the lights go out and you can see nowt) for 10/12 hours a day with only rats for company. An amazing experience, even if one of the miners clipping my light on around my waist with a 2 metre belt said 'is it long enough for you love.' Pit humour. I hope!
A Spring Affair has been sold to Readers Digest for an abridged version so I'm off down to 'the smoke' for a nice lunch and a chatty interview. I love the train. Especially when I've got the rest of 'Eclipse' to keep me company on the way down. I am LOVING that book. Just don't know what to wear because of the weather - bikini or duffle coat. Maybe both?
MAY
Here is a link on our fab new Simon and Schuster site where I'm answering questions and so are loads of other authors. Have a poke around!
1st - Oh check out a sparky new site - have a look here
And this month's column in the BARNSLEY EYE is here! It's all about cats this month.
APRIL
Of course the big news is that the SPRING AFFAIR is now out and sold over 7500 copies in the first 3 weeks with a reprint already happening, so it's obviously hitting the mark. 1500 of those sales were made in lovely Morrisons and loads in smashing Sainsburys - and they've both reordered which is just fabulous. I've been visiting various stores in the area. Signings are always hit and miss but it was a very useful exercise and I met some great people. One lady really wanted to read my latest because her it seemed to mirror her own life. She said when she divorced that she sent her husband's passport on - it was one of the old kind with a section for 'distinguishing features'. 'I wrote NO BALLS on it,' she said. And an old guy passed me today, looked at The Birds and the Bees and thought it was a sex instruction book for kids. After my last signing I went into the cafe and had the best baked spud of my life. Bliss!
The high rating of book 3 seems to be pushing up the sales of the other two books too, which is a nice bonus. I have never got to 213 on Amazon before. I think the cover is really doing the biz.
I've been doing a heck of a lot of newspaper articles. More to follow - both on the book and for my work as a Patron for Haworth Cat Rescue. Our raffle has just been drawn - we raised £540, split between the two charities and it's nice to give something back to the community which might sound a bit 'up-myself' but nevertheless it happens to be true.
Had my big treat a couple of Sundays ago when we went to the WWE Raw in Nottingham and I got to meet William Regal (and the beautiful Layla). We had quite a natter. My local history of wrestling, I hope, will be completed very soon. Things are always getting in the way of my plans but I have so many fantastic pictures and anecdotes to put together. And the Northern Wrestling Reunion is scheduled for Sunday June 7th in Rothwell. I'm taking Dwight J Ingleburgh and Pedro the Gypsy with me - people will be delighted to see them both. Oh and Karl Von Kramer will be there too.
Oh and I've got the script for Shirley Valentine next week. I've been asked to play her in the Lamproom Theatre next year and I am SO excited about it. It's a gorgeous theatre and I've had some great nights out there. And I LOVED being on stage with Carl Wilde at the beginning of the month. If you get the chance to see him - go because you will LOVE him. He's the funniest, campest, loveliest guy. Great, great fun.Oh and Shirley Valentine is a monologue. A MONOLOGUE!!! How terrifying is that - but how can I turn it down???
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| Clutter clearing can change your life - I know this because that's exactly what it set in motion for me - a total life change! |
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